The Family Bed

This, too, is a repost.

Perhaps this is not a good time to talk about the family bed. It's 11:30 or so and my two year old just went down finally (I think). The 7 month old went down after nearly nursing me into traction about a half hour ago. We started at 8:30 with the baby and at 9:30 with the two year old. The baby has decided that she likes staying up, too. Last night she was up until 2 - or should I say this morning?

We were finally (this week) able to enforce (mostly) a half hour limit for laying down with our older child. Two hour (or more) marathons of cuddle were not unusual. During said marathons, she would fall asleep only to pop up as soon as we moved. This week we put our feet down (and no, not in a stomping tantrum - tempting though it was) and insisted that if she was not asleep within a half hour she would have to go to sleep by herself (horrors). Of course, she's not exactly by herself, she has the baby in there to keep her company. However, she only likes to keep Conner company when Conner is trying to go to sleep; the rest of the time she doesn't want Conner in the same room with her, much less touching her.

Anyway, we had two lovely nights of peace. Then it happened. See the picture at the top? That is Conner. I took it last night at around 10. Conner's bedtime is between 7 and 8:30. At least it used to be. Now it's a crapshoot. Who knows? Though it has only been a year, I'd already forgotten the all out brawl against sleep stage, which has just started with Conner.

Unfortunately, I don't think we will have the half hour limit option with Conner since she claims not to understand us yet and just grins and laughs at us when we talk to her. I've thought about pinning her but it doesn't seem humane. I outweigh her by quite a bit. Still, she's pretty feisty.

What you can't see in the picture is that the bedroom is basically just one big bed: a queen and a single together on the floor (so the little darlings don't have far to fall). So much for interior decorating. It took me until right after Conner was born (I think it was after - it all blurs together) to convince my husband to surrender our decor and go for comfort and safety. Why I bothered I'm not sure. I still sleep in the same foot-wide section, now with one child tucked up against each side so I can't move either arm or roll over. I know. It sounds terrible. But you get used to it.... Unless you're my husband, lucky devil, with the whole single bed to himself (except for a few members of the stuffed menagerie).

I admit that the family bed was originally my idea, I was terrified of crib death, but I would have given up long ago - and I'm sticking to that, it's all his fault. When we put little Maryn in the crib, way back when, and laid down in our lovely big bed in our quiet grown-ups' room, I had about 10 minutes of spreading out, on my back, just how I like to sleep, smiling peaceably, when he said, "I think she's going to be lonely and cold in there. We should go get her.""Do you realize what you're doing?" I asked."I know, I know," he said, "But she shouldn't have to sleep by herself. We don't. I want her in here."And just that simply it began. But you know what the funny thing is? I can't sleep without them, now. They sure do smell good, all cozy and soft.

Gaahhhh! It's 12:45 and Conner's up again!